"Nesting" Is a Creative Custody Arrangement
Posted on Mar 31, 2011 12:31pm PDT
If you are contemplating a divorce or a custody litigation, or you are in the midst of such a family conflict, but you believe that you and your significant other can work together to find a resolution, nesting could be a creative alternative to one or both of you having to relocate with your children.
Nesting is a term that refers to the amicable resolution of a residential custody dispute where the child, or children, remain in their home and the parents alternate living in the home as dictated by the parenting schedule. When one parent is with the children, the other parent lives elsewhere and when it is the other parent's time with the children, that parent returns to the home for his/her time. Typically, there is one "primary" custodial parent for purposes of residential custody and child support. However, the actual schedule for the children's parents depends on the parent's agreement.
I have a couple of mediation clients who are contemplating nesting arrangements because they believe this will maintain some continuity and stability for the children. I have also witnessed successful nesting arrangements. I believe the parent's willingness to abandon the mindset that "the house is mine" "the house is yours" is essential so there is less difficulty with sharing the house. This requires the ability to think outside of the box in the best interests of the children.
Nesting is certainly not appropriate for everyone, but it presents an amicable and creative alternative to the more traditional residential custody arrangements.